Just over a year ago I rolled my eyes at the mere mention of ----YOGA---- I survived soely off Coke Zero and food scraps off my childrens' plates. Pecan pies at 2 am on the night shift, BRING IT. Throw a few bottles of wine in the mix and a string cheese and I was GOLDEN!!
Suddenly, I had a frigging EPIPHANY! I felt like el-crapo! I was heavy, poorly nourished, tired all the damn time and my anxiety was THROUGH THE ROOF. But what was I do do, I needed an overhaul..physically and emotionally.
So on a whim last February, I dragged my not so perky ass to my very first yoga class. How hard can it be, I thought. Whelp, I learned really fast. The instructiors are RIPPED and doing crazy acrobatic related asanas, all while the big oaf in the back of the room aka ME are seriously re-thinking their "yoga will be easy" theory. Its a good thing I have a crazy competitive streak. I was ready! I warriored 1-2 my booty off. I stretched parts of my body that I didn't even know could be stretched. I crowed, tri-podded, side-planked and planked my way to near death. I flew like an airplane and perched in pigeon. I Then the most amazing thing happened, I realized that I LOVED it. OH NO!! How could this have happened. I am Danielle Dunnam fake ghetto fab, not Danielle Dunnam master of all anusaras?!?! How. did. this. happen?
And the suprises just kept coming! As class was coming to a close, the teacher read a quote that I swear was written for me! It was therapeutic almost!! I even chanted in the closing OM!! I was transformed and I was hooked.
At first I felt a little confused. Thoughts were running through my head. Could Ghetto Fab Danielle turn into Yogi Danielle? Could I be a ghetto-fab yogi???? Could I still shave my armpits (obviously an un-true stereotype), what does a "yoga person" eat? They eat Kale and talk about things like "sustainable food" and "Farm Shares" Did I need to hunt my own food? Should I buy a farm? Could I potentially listen to Beyonce's pandora station while doing yoga? Was I too much of a asshole to do yoga, yoga people (yogis) Are not assholes. Should more assholes do yoga to help them become not assholes?? So. Many. Questions.
I rolled up my mat, said Namaste to all of my classmates and went home where GOOGLE always so faithfully awaits with all of the answers. I googled asanas. I googled absurd things like "cute yoga clothes" (I can't get away from my fashionista roots), I googled Budda and Ghandi. I googled India, I googled yoga styles . I googled "chakaras." I was eager to know EVERYTHING, as nothing had made me feel so hopeful in so long.
This brings us forward to the present. I am a full-blown Yogi!!! My anxiety has decreased, by energy is amazing, but most inportantaly my health is better at 34 years old than it has EVER been. So weather you're an assole or not you should get your booty to a class and give it a shot!~
NAMASTE
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